Tag: Milspouse

Teen Anxiety and Blaming Parents

I recently read an article titled “10 Reasons Teens Have So Much Anxiety Today” and I was really quite shocked at just how much the author generalized and blamed parents in this article. A little too much blame methinks. As if parents don’t have enough stress on them too! How about the fact that in America it’s all about working rather than spending any quality time with your family? How about the fact that teachers aren’t given the respect and recognition they deserve? And yes, I do believe (highly unfairly) some parents expect teachers to raise and discipline their kids.

I think another factor is that society wants to give everyone a medal! God forbid we recognize that our child lost! – Our daughter had a soccer game the other day and it was awful! It was awful to watch. She played terribly. Her team was annihilated because none of them played well. She got into the car afterwards and told us how she played terribly. I said she had some moments that were good, but it definitely wasn’t fun to watch and she certainly wasn’t playing her best. She said she didn’t give it 100% – All we ask is that our kids do their best. Every time. If you are going to commit to something then you need to give it your best. I told her I appreciated her admitting that, but if she wants to play soccer then she needs to give it her best, every, single time. There is no talking it up at our house. We are by no means perfect parents but when our kid doesn’t commit and recognizes it themselves, I’m not going to disagree. I’m not going to praise the not-so-good. I am going to praise her great moments though. Our other daughter has just made a lacrosse team. It’s the B team. She started playing lacrosse at a free clinic last Summer. She did another clinic in Autumn. And another this Winter. She can’t expect miracles. She can’t expect to be the best immediately. It just doesn’t work that way. I’m proud of how she responded though when I told her this morning that she had made the B team. She said that if she wants to get better then she has to work hard. But she’s going to play hard nonetheless and actually said how thankful she was that we actually let her start playing the game now (14).

No one knows if they’re doing the parenting thing the ‘right’ way. Articles like these point out some great things to keep an eye on but they also blame parents in so many ways and that’s when it becomes unfair. We are trying to do our best. We are told what we can and can’t do as far as our parenting goes. We are told we are doing it wrong all the time. “Too many electronics!” “You have to have your kids skilled in electronics!” “They’re not exercising hard enough!” “You’re putting too much pressure on your kid by having them exercise hard throughout the week and playing competitive games on weekends!” There’s a happy medium somewhere there, but we can’t be blamed for everything! Society as a whole needs to intervene in a more productive way. Playtime at school has to happen. Yes to less screen time, but haven’t the so-called experts been saying that for years about TVs?

My son told me he was bored the other night, I told him to read a book or play legos or take his imagination on an adventure! We ended up playing a family card game of Uno. It was fun! Kids need to be bored and parents need to allow them time to develop coping skills, it’s also a time when parents can add some family fun into the mix.

I very much believe in the hierarchy point though. I have friends whose kids seem to dictate all that they do. I have friends who treat their kids as equals and share with them far too many facts about themselves or other adult friends. Your kid is your kid. Not your peer. Not your friend. When they are adult enough, become friends. But they need you as their parent, their guide, their guardian, right now.

This article points out things to keep an eye on within ourselves (as parents) and some modifications we can definitely make in our day-to-day lives as the parents of teens or even tweens, but blaming us for everything isn’t the answer either.

If you’ve enjoyed this blog, Please subscribe to it and feel free to share it! We  cannot be alone in how we think! Come on over to Aussie Mum’s Adventures on FB and like my page: Aussie Mum’s Adventures. You can find me on Twitter: @ozmumsadventures, on Instagram: Ozmumsadventures, on Pinterest: Aussiemumsadventures. I’m one of those who is passionate about many subjects including parenthood and would love your feedback on any blog I’ve written.

Miscarriage – Mourning the could-have-beens – Part 1

 

Screen Shot 2019-02-20 at 10.53.02 PMMiscarriage, it’s the kind of word that comes with lots of stigma. It’s the kind of word that seems to hush the room when spoken, no-one knowing what to say, yet statistically, it happens often.

According to March of Dimes:

“Miscarriage (also called early pregnancy loss) is when a baby dies in the womb (uterus) before 20 weeks of pregnancy. For women who know they’re pregnant, about 10 to 15 in 100 pregnancies (10 to 15 percent) end in miscarriage. Most miscarriages happen in the first trimester before the 12th week of pregnancy. Miscarriage in the second trimester (between 13 and 19 weeks) happens in 1 to 5 in 100 (1 to 5 percent) pregnancies.

As many as half of all pregnancies may end in miscarriage. We don’t know the exact number because a miscarriage may happen before a woman knows she’s pregnant. Most women who miscarry go on to have a healthy pregnancy later.”

This might be a tad tough to read, it’s certainly tough to write, but sometimes we need to share our stories to help others through their struggles. it’s that spoken about, yet unspoken thing that so many women have to endure. The United States is currently in the midst of an abortion debate, but we seem to forget about those who tragically lose a fetus, particularly when they are trying to conceive.

Unfortunately I know this from experience, twice. The first time, I was 8 weeks pregnant, we were super excited. Life was good. We had moved to Texas from Italy, my husband had left the Navy and started school to earn his bachelor’s degree. He was working a part time job, our eldest daughter was two and we were ready to increase our family. Money was tight and we didn’t have great insurance coverage but it was good enough to cover a pregnancy and we knew that once my husband had finished his degree, we would be ok. Life had other plans at that point in time though. 

I was approximately 8 weeks pregnant. We had confirmed the pregnancy at a doctor’s appointment when I was approximately 6 weeks pregnant. They told us to make another appointment at 12 weeks, we were delighted. One of my hubby’s friends was having a party and I was designated driver (obviously). We were having a good time when suddenly something didn’t feel right. I went to the bathroom and had some fairly prominent spotting. We left the party shortly thereafter. I was concerned, but tried to remain as calm as possible.

The following morning, I dropped my husband off at work and was driving home when all of a sudden the bleeding became fairly heavy. It was scary. My two year old daughter was in the car. I was alone. We got home and she saw the blood and started crying asking if Mummy was ok. I was more scared for the scarring this could do to her than anything else at this point in time, so I tried to reassure her I was ok. Even thinking about it now makes my heart beat faster. With only one car, it wasn’t even like I could physically go and pick up my husband from work, so I sat there with my little girl and cried and miscarried throughout that day. Alone, in a foreign country, not knowing anyone close by. 

When I did go and pick up my husband, who was blissfully unaware of all that had transpired throughout the day, he saw me and seemed to understand something was terribly wrong immediately. We decided to go to the emergency room to make sure it was a miscarriage and that nothing further was wrong. Unfortunately, it was all but confirmed (another blog to come about this whole ghastly experience) so I went home with a heavy heart. 

I’m pretty sure I cried for the next week or so. I felt lost. I felt like I had failed. I felt alone. I wanted to give my Mum a hug and have her tell me everything was ok, but unfortunately she was on the other side of the world. Thank god I could at least talk to her on the phone! My husband tried to be there for me, but he didn’t really know what to say or do. I couldn’t help him either, I was a little lost and trying to hold my shit together for our daughter. He was doing his best to hold down the fort in every possible way. 

What do you say when someone has a miscarriage? Well here’s what not to say, “it was obviously for the best as something must have been wrong with it.” Um, no. Just no. (and yes, people felt the need to say this to me). That might be true, but when someone dies after suffering incredible pain, you don’t tell their family that it was for the best, it just doesn’t work! Just listen. Say you’re sorry. If you’ve been through it yourself, share that information. Tell the person you have some understanding of what they’re going through. Remember that everyone feels pain differently, your experiences are probably different to theirs and if you’ve never been through it, then you honestly don’t understand. Be honest. Let them talk or sit in silence. Its similar to grieving for a loved one. You didn’t know that child, but you lost the promise of all that could have been. When you find out you are pregnant, you are excited, you can’t help but wonder what this child will be like; is it a girl? A boy? Twins? Will they be a prodigy? Will they be funny? Sweet? What sort of mother will you be? How many adventures will you have? So many things run through your head the minute a pregnancy is confirmed. And it’s all the could-haves that break your heart when you miscarry.

I mentioned earlier that I had a second miscarriage and I will share the details of that in part two of this blog. Miscarriage can be terribly lonely. Women feel ostracized by it. But you are not alone and it’s ok. You will get through. You will be ok. We will be ok. More than likely, you did everything right. No-one can really explain why miscarriages happen, but what we do know is that everyone experiences different emotions when they go through a miscarriage; you doubt your own body, you question what you’ve done to deserve this. Some people grieve immediately, others later. At the end of the day, it’s painful, but you are very much allowed to mourn your loss; to mourn the could-have’s. 

I hope you’ve found this blog helpful and in your time of need, you know that you are not alone. Please feel free to share so others understand how many of us have been through this. Come on over to Aussie Mum’s Adventures on FB and like my page: Aussie Mum’s Adventures. You can find me on Twitter: @ozmumsadventures, on Instagram: Ozmumsadventures, on Pinterest: Aussiemumsadventures.

If you or someone you love has experienced a miscarriage, please remember there are resources out there to help you.

In the USA:

https://www.gopinkandblue.org

In Australia:

https://www.pregnancylossaustralia.org.au

In NZ:

https://www.miscarriagesupport.org.nz

In UK:

https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk

Resources:

March of Dimes

The Perfect Wife!

I’ve been thinking a lot about my next blog and what it should be about. I guess I see a lot of examples of the ‘perfect’ military wife all the time! Now before I go on, I have to make something very clear; everyone’s definition of what makes someone perfect is very different, secondly, there is no such thing as the ‘perfect’ wife. These women just seem to make it all look easy. They are gracious, kind, able to make small talk with ease, can speak to anyone, never have doubts, they know what to say and do at the right time, they know who’s who and what’s what. Now for me, I cannot be something I am not, nor do I wish to be, most of the time, but sometimes……
We (people in the military or attached to the military) live a completely different life to normal people. It’s really quite an old fashioned world in a lot of ways, as the female spouse in many cases, stays home with the children. It’s difficult for spouses to get and maintain jobs because of our constant moving. Most of us are well educated and very intelligent, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! There’s also the matter of giving our children some sort of normalcy; meaning they get one parent at home on a regular basis – one constant in their life. And luckily, in my case, we can afford that, though two incomes would definitely be better, hence the reason so many military spouses are going into independent consulting businesses. But, I stray, that’s not what this is about. This is about the women I meet everyday, the women who have so many expectations put on them, the women who epitomize the perfect military spouse and the women who don’t. 
This past week has afforded me this wonderful opportunity to meet lots of great ladies but I can’t help but feel like my husband got a raw deal. I’m brutally honest; we hosted a small dinner over the weekend for my hubby’s soldiers and they brought me a lovely bottle of wine, but then one of them asked if I liked it, I should have just lied and said yes, but I didn’t! I said, and I quote, “I like almost every wine out there, except for sweet wines.” (Should have stopped there but I didn’t!) I went on further to say something along the lines of re-gifting it or someone will drink it when they come over. Seriously. The grace left me. Afterwards I thought about how rude it was and I’m still berating myself for it, but I follow after my mother and have foot in mouth syndrome! I laugh at myself though, never taking anything I do too seriously, as I hope others don’t either. Once you get to know me, you’ll see that I may have this ability to put my foot in my mouth but I’m as loyal as hell and I’ll never give you the BS side of it! You’ll always get the truth, whether you like it or not. But sometimes I should limit my answers to one word! Yes, short and sweet. 
I see people every day who are seemingly, the ‘perfect’ military spouse; they wear the right clothes, they have the right answers, they are always so positive, they serve the right food, they never drink too much wine, they go to church, basically they epitomize everything the perfect military spouse should. Sometimes I really wish I could do it all too. I say way too much, I speak my mind. I disagree with certain things the military does and say it out loud! I dress well, but I show cleavage (oops). I don’t know when to shut-up, seriously! I share way too much on Facebook too. I’m Australian and that in and of itself makes me different too. I’m not religious. And that’s a big one; I’m not an atheist either, I just try to live by the golden rule and if I started going to church, it would be hypocritical of me. But that in and of itself outcasts me. As my husband gets higher in rank, all of these things are going to start impacting him more and more, I’m going to have to watch what I say and do.
I hear some of you sitting there reading this saying, “so what!” But, it’s truly a big deal. In this life, the fact that I don’t fit in in so many ways, will always mean I’m a bit of an outcast. Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of military spouse friends who accept me just the way I am but as I sit here and think of them, none of them have quite so many outcast traits as I do. They know how to talk the talk without trying, they too epitomize the ‘perfect’ military spouse. But you know what? I bet they too feel like outcasts at times too! The pressure on us to be the perfect wife gets old. We are living in a modern world surrounded by tradition, facing obstacles other spouses don’t face, and I’m not even talking about the obvious ones like deployments! Instead I’m referring to tradition meets modern, princess meets plumber, hostess with the mostest meets mum with guns (no, not the bullet wielding ones, the ones formed when one clenches a fist and shows muscly biceps). We are put down when we put on weight – yes those soldiers can be judgmental about military wives, yet, considered too much when we take pride in the way we look and dress. We are expected to know the traditions that go along with being a soldier, a sailor, an airmen, a marine, we are also expected to know the ranks, the to-dos, the expected behaviours of our military partners and the second language that comes with being attached to the military (the acronyms are a killer)! On top of all of that we aren’t really considered as anyone important; (though some spouses seem to think they wear the same rank as their service man/woman for some reason) everything is done under our spouse’s social security number! Yes, I know my husband’s better than my own! We can’t do certain things without them either. We move when they move, we take care of everything when their gone but we need power of attorneys to be able to operate normally. Welcome to our world; the world of ‘perfect’ spouses! 
We have a military ball coming up and yes, I do know how to dress appropriately for it, I know what I should and shouldn’t do in the receiving line. Just so you know what I’m talking about if you’re unfamiliar with the military life: at a military ball, we actually do all get dressed up like princesses. It’s not appropriate to wear anything too revealing at these sorts of functions. True ball gowns are called for so if you enjoy dressing up like a princess every now and then, it’s really quite fun. There is a social hour before the official start to the ball where people have a drink and socialize. Once the receiving line goes into play though, we must finish our drinks and make our way along the line of VIPs into the ballroom. During this line, one must ensure one is not carrying a drink (it used to be a factor that one not be smoking either but given most places are non-smoking nowadays, this doesn’t normally come into play anymore). If you know people in the receiving line, it is not appropriate for you to stop and chat either, or to hug them for that matter, unless they hug you first. You will be introduced by your soldier spouse (who is dressed in their military finest) and you will walk through the line and say your hellos to everyone as you greet them. Then you will go to your table and be ready for the night’s formal portion. There are a lot of toasts and particular responses one must say after each toast (all in the program, thank goodness). It is all very proper and one thing I can do is proper, though I probably always end up having more wine than I should and normally I don’t like some of the food so the wine goes to my head faster than it would if I were eating a proper meal. It’s just the small talk I’m bad at. I can’t stand being fake and not getting to the heart of knowing someone so the small talk normally goes out the door in a flash. I’m not saying that small talk means your being fake but saying hello how are you to everyone and not really caring about their response, is definitely not being ‘real’ and we’ve all seen that in action, military world or not! I can’t stand it when people do it to me. Don’t ask if you don’t want the answer, it’s as simple as that, but I digress once again. Small talk and I don’t work well, give me your best small talk lines if you have any ideas, because I’d love to hear them! 

From another angle, I love meeting honest-to-goodness people, you know, the ones who call it like it is. It’s refreshing in our military life, especially when they are seasoned mil spouses. I love talking to people and getting to know them beyond the bullshit small talk; those are the people I become friends with. I love hearing stories about crazy things, I love telling stories about crazy situations we’ve been through. I like to look nice and dress nicely, I like to have that touch of sexiness going on, especially if I’m going to be seeing my husband; yes I’m that woman, the one who thinks my husband is the sexiest man out there and who always likes to tease him just a little so he knows I’ve still got it too. I like it when other women look good too and take pride in how they dress. I’m not talking weight or makeup, I’m talking about looking nice and feeling confident. A confident woman has to be the sexiest kind of woman out there. I wear my workout clothes to the bus stop every single day. But if I’m going out, most of the time, I take pride in the way I look and the minute I take some time for me, I start to feel sexy. 
The perfect wife: No there isn’t such a thing, and everyone’s definition is very different. There’s definitely a lot of close calls in my circle; I’m not one of them. Would I like to be? Sometimes, very much so. Other times, definitely not! I’d certainly like to better my social skills, perhaps learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes. For my husband’s benefit, it would be nice if I could fit in a little more, not that he’s too concerned on most days. But I do the best job I can do, I take each challenge as it comes and try to greet every person I meet without judgement, we are definitely judged enough by others. No, sometimes I don’t fit in at all. No, sometimes I don’t say the right thing either, but I’m there doing the best job I can and being the best me, I can be. But to military spouses out there feeling like they aren’t ‘perfect’, or feeling like they’ve screwed up something, you aren’t alone. We can’t all be perfect and even the perfect ones screw up sometimes! 😉 All we can do is be who we are, bettering ourselves all the time and being the ‘best’ us, we can be. 

Hiatus officially over

I’m back! I have returned from my Summer hiatus and all is well in the world; well almost. Honestly, I have written so many blogs that I’ve yet to publish just because I needed to focus on my family and get everyone refreshed and healthy and ready to face a new day upon returning to SoKo (South Korea just in case you’re not familiar). We ended up in Guam for a week followed by a trip to Australia – all of which was very low key and relaxing, just what the doctor ordered for us all. The children finally stopped coughing after we had been away for about 3 weeks (one of my main reasons for so desperately wanting to leave the peninsula after China’s yellow dust had sent us all into chronic coughing mode)! 
Oh how lovely it was to breathe clean air! One has no idea until one no longer has access to it! Anyway, I’m back and ready to continue writing my blog for as long as you’ll put up with my opinion sharing and crazy stories! 😄 Hubby has told me to give the blog a miss and continue to write my book but I’m not sure if I’m there yet, so we’ll do this for right now and see how we go….

Life – Not so Redundantly!

It’s been a while. It’s been crazy busy! It’s definitely been an adventure. I’ve been asked to categorize this blog but I can’t. I can’t because A: My interests are so varied they cannot be categorized into areas that would normally classify as categories and B: The crap life shoots at me and mine, cannot be classified either and you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way! 😆
We have been busy living, we have been busy doing. Unfortunately not necessarily doing everything I have wanted to do, but doing stuff nonetheless! “Come to South Korea”, they said, “it’ll be fun!” they said, “you’ll love it”, they said, “You’ll get to do lots of traveling!” They said. Well, we are so busy socializing every weekend that there’s no time for anything else! Between our kids’ birthdays and birthday parties, between other kids’ birthday parties, between end of school parties, between the numerous social occasions we find ourselves part of because of hubby’s work, between all the crazy stuff that consistently happens on a daily basis, even we, are incredibly busy, there has been no more time for travel, there has been no time for writing, there has been no time! Let me see, aside from my Jeju writings, when was the last time I wrote about anything in my life? Yes, it’s been a while! 
We came back from Jeju and I spent Tuesday May 31st unpacking and washing, Wednesday I had my follow-up Dr appointment (that I previously blogged about) followed by a Family Readiness Group meeting where we all brought a Mexican themed potluck dish. In between both appointments, I had to begin making dear son’s birthday cake as his party was on Sunday 5th June. It’s best to make the cakes early enough and freeze them ensuring they are the correct shape, etcetera, with plenty of time to make adjustments if necessary. I got one cake made on the day and followed it up with another on the Friday. We had a function to go to on the Thursday night followed by another one on the Friday night (both for hubby’s work). Friday day though, my girlfriend came over and watched as I made the cake, then made my own marshmallow creme fondant (taken from this blog:  http://thefarmgirlrecipes.blogspot.kr/2011/04/marshmallow-creme-fondant.html?m=1), the fondant is delicious! The only problem is the high humidity here did cause it to start to ‘melt’ by the Sunday morning, meaning I had to do some rearranging by the time we got to the party. But the best part was that every single kid (and adult) ate that fondant, unlike the normal response I get to store-bought fondant. 
 The function on Friday night was then followed with something called an ‘at the gate’ sale. We literally set up shop at the gate and soldiers and spouses grilled hotdogs and hamburgers and sold them to people coming in. It was actually lots of fun, they had set up a dunk tank and a fairy floss machine (cotton candy machine) and had a great system going. Unfortunately we didn’t get there until 9pm as the previous function ran a lot longer than expected, but we got right into it upon arriving. Hubby had worn appropriate clothes to get dunked (and I had changed into comfortable clothes for the bbq event). He got dunked almost immediately (maybe with a little help from his wife) then we talked to other soldiers, family members, their kids and people passing by and had a great time. I had jokingly said to someone that I wouldn’t get in the dunk tank seat for less than $50 & unfortunately, that statement was heard by someone willing to pay it! He did keep missing however and I was hopeful I would walk away unscathed, but alas, the husband got his revenge dunking me into the ice-cold water (literally, water filled with ice!!)! It was definitely fun and something I never thought I would get to do, so no complaints from me and no, I didn’t have a white T-shirt on, get your mind out of the gutter! 😜
Saturday morning was cake decorating time, but only briefly as we were then meeting my lovely friend I had made on the plane on the way over here and watching her son play baseball. We followed that with a long, relaxing lunch, enjoying catching up after so long and reinforcing the knowledge that we were meant to meet on that fateful trip! Then it was home again to keep going with the cake! Spider-Man. 3D. It was a tad redundant but thank goodness I borrowed a pasta machine from my friend to help roll out the fondant. The cake came out pretty nicely and dear son was over the moon:


His party lasted until after 3pm and we got home, absolutely shattered. Monday was a Korean holiday but it was also a day I was able to get into (for a very last minute appointment) an ultrasound of my thyroid gland. Long story, but a couple of years ago, there were nodules on my gland and we have to check them every so often (& all is great right now). I asked the same friend who had hung out with me during cake prep on Friday if she wanted to join me in going to Seoul and she did. It was such a nice drive there, amazing how different it is when there’s no traffic. The appointment was smooth, I organized for someone to collect dear daughter in case I was delayed getting back and we even had a lovely lunch, eventually. This friend and I seem to have bad luck when it comes to eating at restaurants each of us recommend; they are never open! And that’s exactly what we found once again in Seoul. Dear son was with us which didn’t help matters when it came to lots of walking! Eventually though, we found quite a nice restaurant by accident and were very impressed by the food!


 The walk around the area was also entertaining, the Koreans love to have fun things about and the location of poop bags to clean up after your doggy’s mess, (though empty) cracks me up every time I look at the photo! Pardon the pun! 


Dear son also loved the giant gorilla in a store filled with all sorts of realistic animals, though I’m not sure where anyone would put them? Definitely an interesting feature! 


All-in-all, a lovely day out filled with good company and a great outcome! 
Should I stop here or keep going? It does get interesting, I promise! 😊 That entire week though was a tad insane! I ran around like a crazy person and got very mad at a number of parents as well when they didn’t even bother to RSVP to our daughter’s 8th birthday party on Friday June 10th (coincidentally my sister’s birthday). I had given the invitations out (through DD) 18 days prior. Things work differently here. Most kids who live off post go to school by bus. We hadn’t met many parents from her class, there just wasn’t the opportunity, in fact, I only had one parent’s phone number. But should I have to go chasing them? I’m thinking an entire blog will be devoted to this subject alone, given the story. Needless to say – Parents you need to step up! Of the 8 invited, we finally heard back (three on the night prior) from 4. 50% deemed it worthy of a response! 
I did get an opportunity to finally see a great craft store here though on the Wednesday prior, with loads of art supplies also. Some things were cheap, some were OTT (over the top) but it was three stories of lovely things and I do like lovely things! I’m not a scrapbooker or anything (though I wish I was) but the painting supplies and other craft supplies and model toy supplies were fabulous! I got my styrofoam ball and pot ready to make dear daughter’s birthday cake, all of which was a surprise to her. It was actually very easy, tedious, but easy and it came out splendidly. There were 42 cupcakes covering the ball though, something I wasn’t expecting but luckily I had enough supplies to make a second batch of cupcakes. I made homemade buttercream icing (using the Wilton recipe) and mixed it with a couple of store bought (I’ve noticed American kids like their store bought icing but it’s too runny so I like to mix it. It was basically a 4:1 ratio, 4 cups of homemade to 1 cup of store bought Betty Crocker. I got 5 bowls and mixed up 5 different colours and was very happy with the outcome. And so was my DD! She loved it! I think that cake got more pizzaz than the Spider-Man cake. It was amazing how something so simple had such a big impact. One of the parents actually thought it was a bunch of flowers until she smelt it! 


Maddy’s birthday party was a two part affair, a slumber party at our house followed by a trip to this amazing kids’ cafe here in South Korea, called La Cartata! Hubby had another work event that involved families so even though I missed out, it was a great night for him to take our other two along for this event and leave Maddy and her friends here to have Mummy’s undivided attention. Mummy even got her friend to come over and help chaperone and oh what fun we had. We did the girls’ makeup, they did ours. We did fingernails and toenails and they did ours. They loved it! Maddy even said that although she was worried because no one had RSVP’d in the beginning of the week, it ended up being the best birthday party ever! And I must agree. I set up an ice cream bar for the girls as well and they each grabbed a cone, a waffle bowl or a regular bowl and got a choice of so many toppings to put on their ice cream that even a fro yo place would have been a tad jealous! They all thought they had gone to Disney! It was seriously a huge success. Brilliant! Best of all, we two adults had fun (aside from the screaming) but when there’s 7 & 8 year old girls around, screaming is par for the course as my friend soon found out!


Saturday morning worked out a little differently than we had planned. Only one girl stayed the night, yes one girl out of the four actually stayed, though one girls’ mother did say she would be coming the next morning. It was just a bit odd. They are now all turning 8, I thought they would be old enough to stay the night, but I guess not, though only 2 out of the four actually mentioned this to me when they RSVP’d, leaving the other two Moms to mention they would be picking their child up that same night, when they dropped them off. But what did I expect? Given all that notice and everything? 😉 I understood the no overnight thing, but not the not coming to the party the next morning, I even offered to swing by and pick them up (like a true minivan owner) but no. One girl had sport, the other was ‘busy’. All very odd. 
So here we were, heading off to this amazing venue that I had already paid a deposit on, not sure if they were going to go ahead and charge us for the 10-12 children we said we would have, yet us turning up with our three (literally our own three kiddos) plus one, with the possibility of another coming. I reached out to our neighbours and suggested we take their two little girls with us also and I’m so glad we did because they all had an amazing time. Two hours in the best kids’ cafe I have ever been to; a race track, a bounce house, a ball playground, numerous rooms filled with toys and activities, food, cake, and most of all fun! What more could a kid want? They had a magnificent time. On top of that, the place is clean, the staff are amazing, you can see your kids almost anywhere they are, yet you can sit there and adult if you want to! Yay! Once again, brilliant! The two parents who’s girls did come, were amazed at how great this place was and our neighbour’s little girls have been begging to go back! 


On the Sunday, we had another birthday party to go to followed by a dinner on a rooftop. The day was fun yet filled with the interesting; let me just say this, it isn’t only us who have our share of adventures! They had hired a bounce house and a cotton candy (fairy floss) machine, in fact the same one we had hired just a week before. We all have transformers allowing 110V through our houses alongside of the 220V standard local power. Anything you rent from the post/base, will always be 110V and in this instance, it tore through the transformer. I kept walking past this one particular spot saying how much it smelt and everyone kept putting it down to the fairy floss machine, but I knew it wasn’t, I didn’t push it hard enough though as it took smoke coming out of the little storage room before anyone really questioned the smell. Their entire 110V was kaput for the day, yet the party wasn’t even half way through. We did all we could to help but hubby and I were both too exhausted to try to entertain even more children so we eventually called it quits, knowing we could go and adult on our friend’s rooftop. It was just that time. And relax and adult we did (for such a short time mind you, given everyone had school the next morning). But it was nice after such a huge weekend that was literally all about the kids. We actually got to see something called a hummingbird moth. This moth has the same peculiarities as the hummingbird. It doesn’t seem to stop moving and uses its long beak type thing (called a proboscis) to suckle from the nectar of flowers. It is captivating and beautiful, yet most definitely not a bird. Not something we expected to see and truly appreciate on a rooftop in South Korea. 


And that is where I think I need to call it for this particular blog. Life here is filled with entertainment on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s extremely funny, yet sometimes you have to search for the humour. I feel like the only way to get through all of the craziness is to search for the humour. And sometimes I have difficulty doing that. I don’t like writing when I feel pessimistic or when I cannot see the funny side to something. It just feels like the world has enough pessimism and those of us who write to share/entertain, should write when we are feeling good and able to share in a positive way. Especially when I am writing of my crazy adventures here in South Korea. I haven’t shared anything too personal for a while because yes, we have been stupendously busy, but I’ve also not had the inclination to want to share in the light I would like to share. Obviously I’m also pretty good at getting on my high horse about things (i.e. RSVP’s) but when it comes to this crazy life, I want to share with you in a serious yet satirical way, underlined with a little bit of sarcasm and an optimistic sense of humour. Stay with me if you enjoy my writing. I won’t stop. I cannot stop. I just may have to delay every now and again. And please, as always, talk to me, let me know your thoughts. If you like my blog, share it. If you want more, let me know what you want more of! Email me at Aussiemumsadventures@gmail.com. 

Jeju Island Part 1

We had been told by many people that Memorial Day weekend (the last Saturday, Sunday, Monday in May) was a great time to visit Jeju Island, also known as the ‘Hawaii of Korea’. So we booked our package mini holiday and off we went.

So let me first start with the entire month of May being both chaotic and not necessarily the best time for me (please read my other blogs if you’re interested in knowing more). The week leading up had been very busy for all the family with Hunter’s birthday, field days for both girls, exams for Ally, excursion for Hunter, busy days for the husband, dental appointments for three of us, you name it! We were ready for our little holiday! Unfortunately expectations and reality didn’t quite meet.

Thursday night we had Ally’s choir concert, followed by multiple things when we got home. Friday the kids all went to school but hubby (who had the day off – sort of) and I had to go and pay a deposit for a birthday party, do a couple of errands, then he had to call into work and take care of some business whilst I did some grocery shopping. From there we bought Maddy’s birthday present, and that was it, day over, the kids came home from school, we got them showered and dropped our dog off then headed to the dentist. Friday night was a late night, with our dental appointment taking longer than expected, then it was home to pack. I fell into bed about 1am only to awaken at 0545. Yay.

Saturday

Everyone was tired when we set off for Gimpo airport at 7am. Thank god for the Waze app. If you live in South Korea, you will soon find this a necessity. We took a couple of wrong turns even still, but I had allowed us plenty of time for error and/or traffic (something one must always allow for in South Korea). We eventually made it to domestic departures and the domestic car park, only to be told the wait to get into the car park was itself about 1 hour, what! Yes, if you plan to park at the domestic terminal at Gimpo airport, allow yourself at least 1 hour. Panic mode did set in a little then but I had seen a lot of cars waiting for something at the actual departure area and hubby suggested maybe we could leave the car there. We took the loop back around and pulled up behind all the cars and I jumped out and found someone who spoke English to ask. This was valet parking. For an extra ₩15,000 we could leave our car here and have it delivered to us upon our return and we wouldn’t have to wait in the other line. “Yes! This will work!” we said in our haste, not quite realizing at the time that parking itself was also going to be more expensive than we had originally planned. All in all, it cost us ₩55,000 (about US$50) and we parked at 0900 Saturday morning until 1900 Monday night, but we made our flight, so it was worth it for us.

They took a video of our entire car, handed us a piece of paper and we went and found our checkin counter. Our travel agent told us we wouldn’t need ID’s for the kids to check in but we thought it best to be prepared, so we bought their passports with us (thank god we did that too as we’d still be standing at the counter 3 days later had we not)! Bring your little one’s passports. After checking in we were told to wait for 15 minutes so they could notify us of any issues with our bag, we did, then we left. Unfortunately something was taken from our bag, we were not notified until we reached our hotel in Jeju and found the notice in the bag but we couldn’t read what was taken either and couldn’t find anything missing, so who knows! The lock never went back on to our suitcase (we only took one check-in for all of us), the zipper was closed over our son’s walkie talkie, so the antenna was sticking out through the zipper as well). Oh well.


We get to the Jeju International airport and have been given a piece of paper (more like a booklet) directing us to the car rental location. it is raining. We hum and ha about whether we should all walk there and eventually decide yes, we should. We nearly get hit by a taxi as we are crossing at a pedestrian crossing with a green light, so, with Hunter in my arms, I karate kick the side of the taxi, I am a little pissed off by now and that just really made me mad. The taxi speeds off and the whole family are a little in shock and awe at Mummy’s kicking skills! 😜

Eventually, the rental place is located and the exchange is actually very easy. Yay! It’s the little wins! Everyone is starving, so the plan is to make our way to our hotel (we are staying at the M Stay – Taepyeong-ro 353beon-gil 14, Seogwipo) and look for somewhere to eat along the way, here is where we hit some trouble.

Let me give you some background information; I have picky eaters and a reasonably picky husband. I too am not fond of many foods on offer in South Korea. I worry about meat being something other than beef, pork or chicken, I’m also concerned about which part of the animal they are using. We all like very lean meat and that too, is something not found in too many places. None of us eat ‘fishy’ fish and I’m about the only one who will eat anything else that comes out of the sea. Jeju Island was challenging to say the least and given that horse meat is consumed regularly on Jeju, I was very skeptical about what meat was actually what. 

We found no restaurants of appeal on the hour long drive to the hotel. We finally pulled into the hotel and the rain has gotten heavier but it was still somewhat warm so the plan was to find some food then get in the pool and take it easy for the rest of the day.

Ms Lee (our travel agent at the CTO on Camp Humphreys) had told me there was a pool but it was outdoors, I said that I didn’t mind, as long as there was a pool. Well we arrive in the hotel, which is very nice mind you, I check in and ask where the pool is. At first they didn’t seem to understand me, but that wasn’t the problem at all, the problem was the pool didn’t open until June 1st! Not good! Not good at all. No one is happy.

Ok, let’s tackle this from a different angle, let’s just unpack, we’ll wander around and get some food then we can tackle the pool issue. So, we head to our very modern, very small room. I pull out the snack bag, thankful I brought something with us and everyone eats a little bit of something to tide them over so we can wander the streets near the M Stay Hotel to find something that all will eat. And I laughed and laughed.

We literally walked those streets for about two hours. There was an abundant amount of fish. The streets were dirty and filled with filthy garbage. The rain had started to subside but the puddles everywhere made one cautious to walk, in case a hidden danger lurked within. I carried my son, well the husband I took turns, because he only had open toed shoes to walk in. The minute the sun came out, everything started to smell too. We walked by restaurant after restaurant hoping to find something, anything. We stopped at a pizza place but the salad bar looked awful and the pizzas had fish on them. There were some barbecue pork places (Jeju is well known for its ‘black pig’) but the places either smelled too fishy or weren’t as clean as anywhere I would have liked to dine. We found a bakery that also sold pasta but not like any pasta any of us would have eaten, though we did buy a yummy cheese focaccia for the kids to share until we found somewhere suitable. During our adventures of hangry whining, we did stumble upon a very pretty street that was closed off and filled with artisans and their wares. The street is named after the artist who’s place of residence for a period of time (more of a small room within a hut) is along it; Lee Joong Seop (Lee Jung Seob). You can find more information about this famous oil painter here: http://m.jejuweekly.com/news/articleView.html?idxno=352


Eventually, when the hunger overtook us and the whining would shortly lead to someone getting hurt, we had to stop. Angel In Us cafe seemed the place to do that. We had been into at least 15 cafes – all of them offering coffee, cake and beer. Yes, I kid you not, if you want to eat/drink those things, you will be just fine!
So the hubby checked the menu at Angel In Us and there was a grilled cheese & ham sandwich. There was also a ham, egg and cheese ciabatta that I opted for. It was a small fortune, but anything to stop the rocky road we were on. The entire family was at the point well beyond walking on any egg shells. Hangry could no longer define anyone!

The sandwiches and ciabatta arrived, we all dug in. Mine was actually pretty good but the cheese and ham toasted sandwich was smeared in some sort of awful sweet mayonnaise type sauce. They all spat it out almost in synchrony. It would have been funny at any other time, but not now. Dear son decided he too loved my ciabatta and proceeded to eat most of it. I couldn’t bring myself to order another one given the whopping price and the small size. Hubby forced himself to swallow his sandwich given how hungry he was and the small fortune we’d spent on his sandwich too! I was sure that he wanted to behave like a three year old at that point in time, laying on the floor, kicking and screaming and partaking in a tantrum of tantamount proportions, but he didn’t. Somehow he kept his cool. If you know my husband then you know it takes a lot for him to get upset but when he’s hungry, it is a completely different ballgame. We are all done by now, just done. It is time to head back to the hotel and eat some snacks then come up with a new game plan for where to eat dinner. Off we go.

By now, I am sorting through a list of international restaurants in Jeju. Unfortunately, the family were a tad tainted by the idea of eating somewhere local given the quality of restaurant we had seen so far. I had posted something on Facebook about the frustration we were all feeling but I hadn’t really given the entire story about the cleanliness of the numerous restaurants we had already observed, so I think some of my FB friends were fairly quick to judge even the fussiness of my family, but to be fair, it had thus far been a pretty horrid ordeal. I had read some rave reviews about a place called Gheckos, so we headed to the car to try once again eating somewhere. We drove the 14km to get to the restaurant and though I had read that some thought it difficult to find, we actually found it fairly easily, it is literally just off on a side road, rather than the main road. Unfortunately though, Gheckos was closed for renovation! Can you believe it? Here we were, 2 adults, 3 kids, Having had nothing decent to eat for the entire day, and the one place we were relying on being open, the one international restaurant that was at least sort of on our side of the island, was closed for construction! Some expletives were said.


Hubby is looking at me for some answers and I am looking at him saying I have none. None whatsoever. We sat there, somewhat in shock and awe for about 10 minutes, neither of us knowing what the best move was. It was now after 8pm Saturday night. Eventually, I suggested we meander down the road for at least another few kms and see if any of the resorts (there were some on our map) were open and if they had restaurants serving international cuisine in them. There weren’t any. Resorts or restaurants. Well there was one place that looked pretty dodgy and had some fishy looking pictures and everyone said no in unison. So we turned around. We had passed a McDonalds about 8km back near the stadium so that was where we headed. Bloody awful McDonalds! What else could we do by now? Some basic food was bought (the McDonalds was dirty also) and to the hotel we returned, hoping Sunday would be a better day, thank god it was, in some ways.

m.jejuweekly.com/news/articleView.html?idxno=352

The Full Korean Experience – not necessarily the experience I wanted

I have been humming and ha-ing over this week’s blog and whether or not I wanted to share with the world everything that has happened. Backwards and forwards, my thoughts have gone, do I? Don’t I? Should I focus on something else, there’s been a lot you know! But at the end of the day, I think this may just help someone else out there and prevent them from going through the nightmare I went through on Monday. 
Where to start? I guess the beginning is a good place. So for those of you who aren’t familiar with my blog, I have been on a fitness/weight loss quest for approximately 80 Days. Last year, I returned from Australia to Colorado and pretty much stopped exercising for a time as I had house renovations to finish, a house to sell (then rent out when we couldn’t sell it in time), furniture to divide as we were moving to South Korea and could only take half our stuff if that, three kids to take care of, a husband who had to go away for a lot of the time, and the regular activities of life. Exercise sat on the back burner. Before long, it was the holiday season and our time to say goodbye. Event after event meant lots of eating and drinking were in the works, it didn’t help that it was winter and one could stay bundled up and cover all those spots that weren’t looking so great. Unfortunately once you hit the big 4 0, things slow down also, so you must stay on top if you wish to stay in shape.
We went on a cruise in early January looking for some sun before we moved, unfortunately, even that was sparse. South Korea was literally my worst winter nightmare when we arrived with the temperature in Seoul sitting at a balmy -28 to -32 Celsius for the 3 days we were there. We literally went outside in layer upon layer but the damp air combined with wind chill left us all miserable. Our poor puppy didn’t get much playtime outside in those 3 days. Again, exercise didn’t really happen. In fact, it didn’t really happen until our furniture arrived in late February when we finally got our treadmill. 
On March 7, I decided to write a blog about all of my adventures here in South Korea. I seriously have this sign on my head that says ‘if you are a weirdo, please approach’. There is another one somewhere else that says: ‘If you are looking for the most ridiculous, unimaginable situation to happen, then come stand by me and we can go through it together!’ It’s crazy, but true! My husband is always saying, “You should write a book!” I thought I’d start with a blog. Please feel free to go back and read the journey from the beginning. 
Anyway, I started exercising using BeachBody programs and here I am 80 Days later and the results are not yet what I would have expected but I’ve not really dieted or anything either. So, a few weeks ago, my neighbour took me to this dermatologist office where she is getting ‘fat’ shots. I researched what these shots were and they are actually Lypolysis shots. The experts are still undecided on benefit versus risk factor for these shots but they seemed for the most part, fairly good. I met one lady here who has been on them for 18 months and swears by them. She has lost over 60lbs doing nothing but these shots. Given the fact that I wasn’t really seeing any results at that time from working out daily, I thought I’d give them a try and share the story with my readers. What could it hurt? The number of women (both Korean and American) in that clinic, was amazing! Obviously, lots of people are doing this here. Here’s what I didn’t mention in the blog; they also give you a prescription and you pop over to the Korean pharmacist next door and get it filled. I tried to find out what this tablet was in every possible way I could. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find out anything. All I knew was that it suppressed your appetite. Well, I was at my wits end by this point and thought, “why am I not losing any weight, perhaps I need something like this to kickstart everything.” So, after asking others about the effects on them, I decided to try it. 
Last Monday, I awoke in the morning feeling like rubbish. We have all had this horrible thing from the yellow dust coming in from China. It is literally like a cold, cough, chest thing, with a runny nose that never goes away. Ally, our daughter, is suffering the most, followed by myself. I have even had to use my asthma puffer (I have a very mild form of asthma called exercise induced asthma and haven’t had to use ventolin for a very long time) on a daily basis. The exercising has been tough for me because I just seem to cough throughout it and have limited energy all the time and then end up having to take my inhaler because I can’t breathe. I don’t feel I am getting fitter at all, even though I am following the Insanity program very rigidly.
 I got everyone off in the morning except dear son, who had had a high fever since Saturday night. I had 2 coffees in the am and pottered around basically procrastinating because I didn’t feel I had the energy to work out. It was then I thought about the prescription and how everyone had said that it not only suppresses your appetite but it also gives you energy, so I took it. About 20 minutes later, my mouth started getting really dry. Like crazy dry. I drank a liter of water without even realizing I had done so. Then I started feeling energetic. I refilled my water bottle and went to begin Monday’s regimen, which was a fit test followed by the start to Level II of Insanity. Basically a 1.5 hour workout. I stopped and refilled my water bottle numerous times, I also had to stop and use my inhaler twice because I just couldn’t breathe, eventually I finished the workout. I came downstairs and dear son was engrossed in a movie and I started feeling really light headed. I was so sweaty and yucky that I literally thought that before I sit down, I’ll take my workout gear off and just put a loose Tshirt on so I can cool down then go have a shower (this seemingly unimportant tidbit will become relevant in the story later). “Crap, I forgot to eat!” Is what I said to myself. So I went and got Hunter and I some lasagne. On the way back from the kitchen, I almost fell over. I just couldn’t catch my breathe. It was all very, very strange. I could feel my heart pumping like crazy and yet I was dizzy and exhausted and finding it hard to breathe all at the same time. I kept thinking that I just needed to eat something as my body was feeling hypoglycemic after that crazy workout. I forced myself to eat some lasagne then lay back on the couch waiting for the food to hit me. It didn’t get better. I closed my eyes and kept calm, but I just wasn’t feeling good at all. My phone rang right then and I couldn’t even answer it, it was my husband. I sent him a couple of messages back:


I closed my eyes and the phone rang again and even though it was in my hand, my hands didn’t seem to want to work. I saw it was my realtor and I knew she had our upstairs dehumidifier to deliver but I just couldn’t talk or do very much at that point in time. Obviously, she was in the neighbourhood as next thing I know she’s knocking on the door. Hunter went to the window and looked out so she knew I was home, but I just really didn’t want to deal with her at that point in time. Eventually, I crawled to the door, because she kept calling out to me and I let her in. Then she saw me and started panicking. She then started trying to call my husband, yet he had gone into a meeting and not even taken his work phone in with him, his work phone he’s supposed to have on him at all times! Judy started really panicking then and asking who else she could call. My mouth then stopped working and it was getting very difficult to speak at all but I kept calm because Hunter was looking at me the entire time wondering what was going on. I could see my neighbour’s car wasn’t there anymore (the one I went to the dermatologist with) so I told Judy to call another friend as I knew she was home, we were supposed to do something together that afternoon, that was until Hunter got sick. It was all a bit of a calamity from there on. My friend got here and immediately called an ambulance, but they wouldn’t come off post and wanted to transfer her to the Korean ambulance, but she didn’t want that. She later told me she then called her husband who told her to drive me to the clinic here as they had ambulances here waiting and would take me to the Osan ER. Hahaha. Sorry. You’ll understand shortly. I kept trying to tell them that I only had a long Tshirt on, so my girlfriend grabbed me a pair of pants (pajama pants mind you but didn’t think to grab me a bra). 
We arrive at the clinic and I vaguely remember us entering through the back door, where the people in there just stood around for a time, not really knowing what to do. My friend told them about the Lipolysis shots but she didn’t know I had taken this medication earlier. They put me on a pulse oximeter (you know that little bandaid type thing that wraps around your finger and measures the amount of oxygen in your blood as well as your heart rate) and I guess my heart was in arrhythmia (which is where your heart beat is abnormal) and in my case, in tachycardia (meaning it was very high, at one point sitting at 150 or something). I sat there in this extremely awkward position because they couldn’t get the bed to lie down, very aware that I wasn’t wearing a bra and mortified that no one would put a sheet or something over me. There was a lot of talking and some of it I heard, some I didn’t. I remember looking up at one point and there was my husband. Obviously, my friend had gotten hold of him somehow. As it turned out, she had called her husband and he had gone to my hubby’s office and literally told them it was an emergency and he had to come immediately as his wife was in hospital. Talk about drama-filled!! Talk about embarrassed! That’s me right now!
Anyway, back to the story, OMG, it’s not even beginning to get interesting just yet! When they said my heart was in tachycardia I spoke up about the prescription from the Korean dermatologist and I tell you what, that Doctor immediately judged me. In his mind, I was the biggest idiot he’d ever met. Had I not been so sick, I would have said something, but to be honest, I didn’t care at the time. He immediately started lecturing about losing so much weight and I tried to tell him that I’d only lost 5 pounds and that was in most part, due to exercise, but my words were a bit slurred and I knew he didn’t really care what I had to say at that point, he was judge and jury and I was guilty of something. Well, it just got worse from there. Hubby had to go and collect the children and they told him I would be transported by ambulance to Dan Kook hospital. We just had to wait for a Korean ambulance. My friend would go with me in the ambulance and he would meet us there. Eventually, three Korean medics came in and stood around talking over me. They were arguing back and forth with the Korean/American nurse about something. Eventually I learned they wanted to take me to Good Morning hospital, but I guess that hospital is now off limits. After what seemed like an eternity to me, they left. I was told later by my girlfriend that there were three ambulances waiting right outside of where we were, yet for some reason they called this Korean ambulance (who then left) and ended up taking me in one of the ambulances that was waiting right outside upon our arrival there. It was the worst trip ever. I am talking the barest of bones ambulance one could ever see. I am not au fait with too many of them but surely they at least have shock absorbers, because this one definitely didn’t! Every hump, pothole, slightest anything, speed bump, you name it, I felt it. I did pass out for a little while and when I came to, I saw it was the American/Korean nurse sitting there beside me in the back of this god awful machine. He kept saying, “Stay with me!” And I kept thinking do I really have to, it was much better when I passed out because I couldn’t feel the pain of this god awful ride! Yes, even in our worst times, there is humour! 
After what seemed like a ride to hell (& in fact was) we finally got to this hospital that the American Doctor on base had been pushing. I don’t remember much about arriving there, just a lot of Koreans doing a lot more talking. I do remember my friend trying to say about my heartbeat and them being concerned it was asthma. Then the American/Korean nurse left and we were all alone. This is where it gets kind of gross, so don’t read on if you’re going to be offended by my over sharing, but this part is really for foreigners in South Korea particularly in this region. You do not want to go to this hospital. Ever. Period. Death’s door or not. Never. 
They put me in a room and started asking if I was pregnant and wanting me to pee. I kept assuring them I wasn’t. There was no chance, they didn’t believe me. It was ridiculous. Eventually I said that I had to go anyway as they had now pumped a whole heap of fluids into me also, but that I couldn’t get up, so they brought a bed pan in and this female nurse came in and put the bed pan under me and stood there pressing my belly trying to get me to go. To say that I was mortified, couldn’t clearly put across what I was feeling. My bladder obviously retracted into somewhere because there was no way I could go with her doing that. She eventually left when I told her no, never to be seen again. I eventually went and no one came along to take the bed pan. Can you believe it? Disgusting. I started coming to my senses then and looked around at the nightmare surrounding me. There was dried blood all over the curtain. Everything was dirty. My husband eventually moved the bed pan to the floor and put it just outside of our curtain but no one came and took it during the entire time we were there. The floor was filthy. I moved so my kids could sit on the bed as I didn’t want them touching anything anywhere. This man came in to take my blood (no one was in the room with me mind you at that point) and grabbed my wrist whilst I wasn’t looking and started to jab a needle in it (on the inside of it). He missed and the excruciating pain shot through me like a cannonball. I have been jabbed many times but none of them quite so painful as that! I literally screamed. He stopped. 


Hubby came back and I was in the middle of telling him about it when this same guy came back to do the other side. “No way!” He said he had to. I didn’t realize he had actually missed on my right side until he had done the left side and there was very little pain. Then I looked at him and saw he wasn’t wearing any gloves! Seriously. In the mean time, the husband looked at the pulse oximeter to see what was going on and why it sounded weird and realized it had never even been plugged in. Here we were at this hospital because my heart had gone into tachycardia yet no one was even monitoring my heart. Then someone came in and handed me a mask and told me to put it on. I did. But I said to hubby it was weird as it was making me feel sick yet I couldn’t feel anything coming out of it. He pulled the cord and low and behold it wasn’t plugged in to anything either. I kid you not. He called for a nurse and one came in and told him, “No, she has CO2. She needs CO2. For the hyperventilation.” 
“What are you talking about?” Was my reply. But she left. No answers, no anything. I thought ok, maybe they know something I don’t, let’s give them the benefit of the doubt, so I put that mask on hoping it would alleviate my hand spasms and tingling. Honestly, after about 15 minutes, the tingling was still there yet I now was feeling extremely nauseous. These people are definitely incompetent was the conclusion both hubby and I came to. In the mean time, my friend’s husband came and picked her up and I owe them both a debt of gratitude. I finally looked at my husband and said, “I just want to go home.” I started crying and was just done with this nightmare. Finally someone else came in and said “ok, I just want you to sleep for a while so we can monitor you, then maybe you can go home.” Monitor me with what? Was my first thought. Different so called medical personnel have come in here 4 times and accomplished nothing each and every time. You don’t even know that thing on my finger is not plugged into the oximeter machine! Rather than blurt all this out, I told her I was feeling much better and I wanted to go home. She said, “Oh, ok, if you’re ok, then you can go.” So we did. I leant on Ally to get to the car. I was feeling like death warmed up but there was no way in hell I was going back into that place, ever. 
We drove home and all I wanted to do was get clean but I just didn’t have the energy. I literally lay in bed until the next morning. Hubby had a thing to go to four hours away but wasn’t sure he should go, I told him I was fine and that all would be ok. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending upon how one looks at it, both Hunter and Maddy were sick on the Tuesday, so we all stayed home and literally didn’t move. They sat on the couch sleeping and intermittently watching Netflix. I laid in bed sleeping and intermittently watching Netflix. I made sure everyone had lots of water and Gatorade and crackers and light snacks except me as the husband kept telling me to eat. I ate lasagne. 
As I write this, it is Thursday. I am taking it easy for now. Working out now takes about 10 minutes longer as I stop often to ensure my heartbeat doesn’t get too high, but I have a follow up appointment next week so here’s hoping we can get to the bottom of this. And no, I’m not going to stop working out. I’ve come too far. But I will be responsible about it. 
I just know my Mum is going to freak out when she reads this, but I couldn’t tell her about it when we spoke yesterday. It had to be emotionless. Funny how Mum’s always worry, no matter how old we get. 
Hopefully we can all take away something positive from this. For me, I’ll not be taking prescription anything when I don’t know what it is. I think the Lypolysis shots themselves were ok, though, who knows, but I think a combination of things transpired last Monday resulting in one of my worst nightmares. We as women set such high expectations on ourselves. I know that I’m still going to want to exercise and try to get my body into the shape it should be, but I also know that not all shortcuts are worthwhile.

Sick Child in my Bed Syndrome! 

Ahhh, Sick Child in my Bed Syndrome, You know, that moment when your baby gets sick with a high fever or something that you have to keep an eye on, but you no longer have baby monitors, ergo, said child sleeps with you in your bed! Why is this a syndrome you may wonder, particularly if you don’t have children? Read on my friend & you will very quickly understand. 

Here’s the thing, this little person, who on a good day comes up to your thighs, turns into an absolute beast during the night. You can have a king size bed and still, it will feel small when that little beast gets into it! At first they start out like an angel and you look at them with their halo glowing and think, “oh my precious little baby! I’m here for you, I just want you to feel better!” 
You worry immensely and toss and turn thinking about all the horrid things that could have made your baby sick. Slowly, you realise you won’t be any good to them without any sleep yourself, so you eventually start to nod off…….until, you get a very prominent kick in the head, back, neck, knee, groin, basically any body part that was innocently laying there minding its own business. You look over and there is your precious angel laying sideways somehow contorting their body so that both parents are receiving kicks at the very same time and both of you are desperately clinging to the mattress for dear life. If the mattress were to be compared to Saturn, you would be literally clinging to the outer ring, hoping to regain your position on the planet somehow, but knowing there was little hope as the alien being you had invited in because he was sick, has literally taken over and the price for regaining control is too high. 
You awaken, for the 15th time in less than 30 minutes and are about to very politely carry sick child back to bed because you cannot take the torture anymore, when he coughs, and you feel his head, and his fever has returned and you start to panic all over again thinking about all the things that could have done this to your baby. This is your night, yes your entire night. 
Your child, who may well be the most uncoordinated being on the planet during daylight hours, somehow finds the contorting, magical super powers at night especially when they are sick, to ensure you too are tortured to the maximum degree possible. And, in that moment, when sleep deprivation and the bruises all over your aching body, are about to overtake you, the halo once more appears and you forget all about the previous 30 minutes knowing in your heart of hearts, you’ll do it all again tomorrow night if you have to. 

May the fourteenth be with you! Ok, we’ll take the force! 

It’s been a few days now since I last wrote a blog and things have been a little all over the place. The local police called me to ensure there were no injuries in my car as this guy is obviously still insisting that he is injured, even though it was such a minor accident for his truck anyway, having no damage whatsoever, not so minor for my car that hit the corner of his truck bed, that was literally made of steel, yet we have no injuries and he is saying he was injured. I don’t think so! I am just hoping he was caught on camera unloading somewhat heavy items from the back of his truck after the accident. If there is one thing I don’t like it is people who try to to take advantage of the system and of situations. I had three children all under the age of 5 in my car, all in the back where the impact was, and they are all just fine. Seriously, just fine and this dude wants to try to sue me? Again, I don’t think so. 
Ok, let’s not focus on the negative, there were some positives from this week, the dentist was amazing and has said that he will continue with Ally’s treatment free of charge! Yes, free! Would any dentist in Australia or USA do that? No is the definitive answer. Very happy with that. Also, I finished the first 4 weeks of Insanity. Here are my photos so far (now the first one in the blue actually goes back to the beginning of the whole thing when I started T25, the second one is from 4 weeks ago when I began Insanity and the third is from tonight):


I can see some results. Not as many as I would have liked given how hard and how long I’ve been working out but also given that I haven’t been on a diet as such, I think it definitely shows that working out is helping me get toned. Oh and I’ve lost somewhere between 6-7.5lbs depending upon the time of day I weigh myself and the day of the week of course 😜 (who knew scales could be so bloody temperamental??). 
It has been a somewhat subdued week, I guess. Hunter went back to school on Thursday and Friday, but Thursday I ran around and did errands, we did get a new (old) car finally. It’s something from 2002. It was cheap. It runs well & has AC and heated seats and a heater of course. All the basics and it means some independence for me, although given how shitty last Monday went, I’m not too keen on driving just yet. It’s weird, I have always been a reasonably confident driver yet this accident has thrown me for a six. 
Friday was spent doing odds and ends at home, Maddy had a half day for some reason, so I couldn’t go get the Lipolysis shots either as I didn’t want to traumatize her, but she helped me so much around the house and got to play and hang out with her friends so it was a really nice day for the most part. We did happen to go to the grocery store and witness a man collapse and gash his head quite severely on his way down. The whole thing was all a little overwhelming with the ambulance getting called and this man literally out cold. It was obviously quite traumatic for her as she didn’t want to go back to the commissary on Saturday (I forgot to get milk) until I reassured her he was ok and that it wasn’t going to happen again whilst we were there. How do I know he’s ok? Well, we had some friends come over for dinner and drinks on Friday night and one of them happened to work with this guy, so when I started telling the story, she chimed in with how she had been the first person they called from the hospital because she was the last to speak with him on his phone. It really is a small community over here and I’m finding this out more and more on a daily basis. 
Saturday morning, we decided to purchase the entire collection of Star Wars movies with copious amounts of junk food (ok, maybe not copious but certainly more than we would normally ever consume in a week, let alone a weekend) and stay in for the weekend and have a Star Wars marathon. I had already worked out Saturday morning so I wasn’t feeling guilty about not doing too much for the rest of the day and the kids seemed to be onboard (until their friends came door knocking wanting to play with them outside). It ended up being hubby and I who really watched the movies with children grazing on junk food and watching bits and pieces then wanting all the blanks filled in because they were somewhat lost. We did make the ‘best parents ever’ stigma for a short time, given there were no set meals over the weekend and food consisted of very few ‘healthy’ things! Honestly, you may think I’m the worst, but every now and again one just has to go with the flow and let your kids just eat crap. They stayed up late interspersing their time throughout Saturday and Sunday with playing outside on their bikes and watching the movies with us. On Sunday afternoon we all went for another family bike ride and it was so enjoyable. This time Hunter didn’t complain at all and his little legs kept pedaling the entire time. It was truly fun, even when it started to rain, there was no complaining from anyone. The rain gave us a good excuse to watch one more Star Wars movie (yes, we made it through the first 5 in order, throughout the weekend). It was just a nice, low-key weekend, with no need to be anywhere at a particular time and no one demanding our attention outside of our family. 


Monday (today) has already been successful. I am now on the recovery week of Insanity, which means doing Core Cardio and Balance every day, starting today. And it felt good. I am still trying to kick this nasal, sinus, chest thingy I’ve got going on but I’m now guessing it’s from the yellow dust coming in from China. From what everyone has told me, it sticks with you for a while until you get used to it. Shit! If I wanted to deal with crap coming into my lungs killing me, I would have kept smoking. This is ridiculous. And poor Ally just cannot get rid of her cough! I’m thinking I will definitely have to take her to make sure she is not asthmatic or suffering from bronchitis or who knows what! This place is not agreeing with her lungs either. She is the worst of us all. One of her teachers actually made me so angry last week. Ally is always coughing, always blowing her nose, it is literally like she is allergic to this place, she gets into coughing fits and almost throws up at times. I have her doing a nasal rinse daily and we make sure she spits out all of the yucky stuff when she’s home, but the poor kid just doesn’t seem to be getting better. Back to this teacher. Ally came into her class and started coughing, the teacher stopped talking until Ally was done (as she apparently does when anyone makes any noise in her classroom that she hasn’t approved of). Then Ally’s nose started running and she had to use the roll of toilet paper this teacher had in her classroom for just such occasions. I can’t remember exactly what she said but she basically singled Ally out and ridiculed her then got mad at her for using too much of this roll of toilet paper. On top of that, Ally’s voice was a tad croaky last week because she has had this thing going on for so long, this teacher then made fun of her because she couldn’t reach the notes she had to reach in the class (it was choir class). Ally came home devastated. I was furious! I thought and thought about the best way to react to this. Ally didn’t want me to make a big scene and she didn’t want this teacher to pick on her further, and I completely understood where she was coming from. I know sometimes teachers will take it out further on the children if the parent intervenes, especially those teachers who don’t offer a nurturing environment to their pupils. That was the last thing our daughter needed in her life right now. So, I didn’t do anything until after I had calmed down immensely. When hubby got home, I asked Ally to tell him about it so I could gauge his reaction to the whole thing and was surprised at how angry it made him too. I told him my idea and as always he suggested I wait until I was calm to do it. Now a part of me would have liked to storm in there and grab this woman and shake her a bit until she came to her senses and stopped being such a bitch, but the more practical, sensible side of me knew that wasn’t anyway to show my child how to resolve conflict, instead I wrote her a letter and gave her a new roll of toilet paper. And yes, the toilet paper was my cheap shot, but at least this way, Ally can use it as much as she likes and this woman can never make her feel bad about it. 


She never gave Ally a reaction, but she hasn’t picked on her again, so I’ll take it as a win for my little (big) girl who needs all the wins she can get right now given her health and her friendship situation. More on that another day. 
Back to today, I went with my friend Rebecca back to see our favourite dermatologist spouse (again, hoping she’s actually a nurse) and to get our Lipolysis shots. This time, I actually took a photo of her sticking a shot into my belly. So weird. She and her husband only realized today that I’m actually Australian, even though I told them the first time I met them. Anyway, they were both excited today because their sons (yes, there are 2 of them) both live and study in Adelaide, Australia, and they have both been there. This was followed with, “it’s pretty, but it’s too hot and too dry.” I felt like saying in return that I could completely understand their distaste as this place is too cold and too wet, as well as too hot and too humid, (and yes, I do mean wet & humid independently of each other) for my liking. On top of that there’s the yellow dust and the monsoon season. Um, hello! Give me Australia’s weather any day! 


 Right, I think I’ve caught you up on all our exciting happenings. The days are definitely getting warmer here in South Korea, we are supposed to hit 33C on Saturday, That’s about my perfect temperature right there, although I think that’s hotter than it ever got whilst we were in Colorado Springs! A sprinkler may be in order though, just in case. 
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I hope you have a wonderful day or night, wherever you are in the world. This Aussie Mum plans on doing so! 😊

Final daily blog – but it’s not over….

So I think today’s the day to end my daily blogs. It has been a very quiet day. My emotions are running a little askew given this crazy week. My faith in the system is faltering as is my faith in people (just a little). It also has given me food for thought as far as this blog goes and the direction I want it to take. I know I have the Insanity Challenge to finish, and don’t worry, I will. On top of that, I’ll keep you informed of my progress, just not on a daily basis. 
I want to be a professional writer. This blog is my start to doing that. I am still trying to find my way as far as the subjects of my writing. I love being able to give you my personal opinion and my take on everything, but I also love writing about the crazy stuff that happens, therefore, on what could be termed a ‘boring’ day, I believe it necessary to give the daily blog a miss. 
Please let me know your thoughts. This is important to me & I truly value any feedback you can give me. Have you enjoyed the blog thus far? I thoroughly enjoy sharing parenting moments, military spouse experiences, South Korea craziness, exercise hurdles (pardon the pun) and general everyday stuff, but only when it’s exciting, not when I’m forced to on a day-to-day basis and not when I’m trying to ‘dress-up’ daily activities in order to keep you entertained.  
I will tell you I did Plyometric Cardio Circuit this morning and it still about killed me! Waiting for the day it doesn’t! My Neighbour and I also headed over to get our Lipolysis shots, unfortunately it also meant we passed the location of all my misery for this week (aka the accident scene) and my friend and her daughter almost got hit by a motorcyclist on the same bloody road! 
Thank you for reading my blogs and staying supportive of me. Please continue to share my more exciting posts. This professional writing business doesn’t happen unless people are aware of you 😊 and please give me your opinions about anything and everything I write. 
I hope your day is amazing! 

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